Wednesday, December 14, 2005

bloody haematology part two

haem paper doomed. it was definitely a bloody one. erkhhh i wish i had more time and i wish i hadnt misdiagnosed my case study!!! yuck yuck yuck. why cant it be iron deficiency?? why cant it be multiple myeloma?? or those complicated acute/chronic myeloid/lymphocytic anaemia thingy????.. the one ive read to the extent-of-microscopic bit??? why why why? i hate whoever responsible for compiling that xm questions. really2 wish the other sections (i.e pharm, pathology, microb) could miraculously compensate my section D blunders. God, i ve tried, ive asked your guidance and now i really sincerely pray for your miracle..
*part 1 was written b4 the exam

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

bloody haematology

myeloproliferative disorder = a set of clonal stem cells disorders involving proliferation of all or some of the blood element and often with a prolonged clinical course. e.g. the entities polycythaemia rubra vera , myelofibrosis, CML, essential thrombocytopaenia and others..

polycythaemia = increase in total RBC mass in blood

relative polycythaemia = haemoconcentration due to dehydration, for instance..

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Athens - June 2005

Of all Athens' remaining (now preserved) ancient temples, i love this one the most. cantik kan?? funny.. Greek empayar.. the origin of plenty basic scientific discoveries.. yet too blind to see that these so called Gods n Goddesses r nothing but their own fictions.. There are never Gods. There's only God.

ni plak academy.. aa salah satu tu socarates la.. not sure which one..

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

im a muslim, get me out of here

So...recently, i attended a talk given by one of my favourite public figures; brother Moez Masoud . well, of course most of you don't know him, because who bother to watch arab channels rather than the middle easterners themselves?in fact, me knowing his existence(which im very glad i did) can be considered by chance.i was browsing from channel to channel to find any interesting program to be watched, when i happened to 'unintentionally' press the no.5 button on my tv remote control which instantly made my tv blinked and displayed the ART channel. i was about to press the remote button again when i realised the forum program was in english. i watched it instead. after 20 minutes, i was in love with it already. The title of the youth program was Parables in the Quran, whereby they exracted several verses in the Quran (particularly Surah Yusuf) and pondered its meaning and tried to apply them in daily lives. Moez was the host. he is brilliant! At that time, i was two months away from leaving for Dublin to further study. That show had definitely boosted the dose of desire to study abroad in my heart. Y? because all my life i've always wanted to do all those things, atending talks, forums, ceremonies, etc etc where you can meet ppl(muslims particularly) worldwide,get involved n get togeher regardless races or cultures, no more boundaries (biaselah, dak2 baru mmg semangat lain macam sket hahaha).
therefore,when came back home during summer holiday last year, i was quite disapointed to find out that the program is no longer aired. so it's a bit like a dream come true laa to have actually met (and talked to) him in person! hehehe.
during his ceramah he stressed upon the importance of having the inward islam within your heart .. i.e. Ihsan. Ppl pray, fast, pay zakat, etc etc but that only the outward of islam (the five pillars), ppl believe in Allah, heaven n hell and so on, but thats just a dry iman unless you feel it in the inside and you display what you believe with your deed . well more or less that's what the talk about. (ill try to get the audio/video record soon inshaallah, n see if i cd put up here).
further info about Moez , feel free to browse moezmasoud official website

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Day Dream time =)

if i were a super-duper rich girl, i would....

  • tout d'abord, Thank Allah real2 much
  • Donate regularly
  • pay zakat of course
  • get a cozy,elegant,high-tech,celeb-style crib ( a condominium will do)
  • enlarge my wardrobe size by 20
  • shopping spree @ les champs elysees weekly(especially @ Louis Vuitton boutique)
  • get me self a complete set of Louis Vuitton bags (suitcases,handbags,hand luggage,purses, key holders,make-up bags etc) shoes, and acessories.. yeah let me be the LV girl hehehe
  • ocassionally treat myself some gucci,Dior,prada or versace ( im quite into chloe paddington bags at the moment, some fendi designs are not bad either.. hmm if only.. money money money!!)
  • buy 2 brand new mercedes Benz in one go n buy him his bentley or rolls royce :) i want that new model volvo too.. cantik seehh
  • open orphanage centres
  • open bakery shop that can compete fiercely with secret recipe
  • mock Paris Hilton's desperate attempts to fame like hell hahahaha

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Summer Sunshine..and my sunburned skin

ah Enfin! the long adventurous two weeks of travelling has was really was.we were in every kind of transport you can possibly think of.planes,taxis,buses,trains,undergrounds,private cars(the number of ppl who were so keen to help us was QUITE a number,you know) and even ended up in a luxorious Mercedes(which was the so-called "our private shuttle bus" the Alba d'oro camping site in Venice told us) -but i guess the best of the best has to be this famous water vehicle, which is -as far as im concerned - is only associated with Venezia. The top everything else, we were in the most beautiful, elegant-looking one.well, at least that's what we had agreed on while strolling around the 'floating city'. it was a really great - indescribably great - experience. (and yes, is romantic)

the accomodations? well not bad.. the worst we got (in term of room condition) would probably be the one in istanbul. though i must say here, the warm welcome we received from the owner kinda swept away most of the nEgativity we had towards that small, extremely dim-lighted room..and the best? definitely the one in Pisa!! a cabin, with two bedrooms,a nice n neat bathroom,a fully furnished kitchen and a long curvy couch:) the only con was it has no air-cond.but still, the night was cold, so no big deal.

the places? mm let me see.. we had managed to visit three - out of seven- the so-famously-believed world's Wonders. The Acropolis, The Colosseum, and The Pisa tower.. however, personally i think we've been to four Wonders actually. what's the fourth? of course the Blue Mosque. the architecture was magnificent!i dont know much about why this mosque's arcitecture made such a big fuss.mind you,i hate physics n stuff.but it surely is one cool masterpiece of arts and designs..
so,have you guys read Dan Brown's angels and demons?well, if you have, you definitely should grab the opportunity (if u had one)to go to Rome, so that you could materialise whatever Mr Brown (with so much effort it seems) had delicately described in the book. The smallest-country-world's-ever possesed Vatican (i wonder when the greedy saudi will release Macca n shares its income with muslims worldwide..fat chance!) , pheeww.. they must have stored more gold than we could imagine! you would gape with awe, i bet.n yet , they still -unbelievably- have the courage to place donation boxes here and there! ok ok.. so vatican..there's the magnificent Michaelangelo's St peter Basillica, the so-believed Peter the Jesus' Apostle tomb ( i doubt it was exactly there, i mean yeah it could be somewhere in the vatican area, but perhaps not specifically at where they marked it.), and well , pope John paul ll fan?you may visit his tomb too (and the rest of the Chistian popes' of course). mm what else in Rome? ahh yes, the most famous toss-a-coin,-make-a-wish fountain,none other than Fontana de trevi (especially after that Lizzie Mcguire movie), and there's the Pentheon, the ancient Roman building which was continuously renovated up to the reinessance(did i spell it right?)'ll find artist Rafael's tomb there.
well, i guess more or less that's it. we really had a good time during the 12-day trip though we had to suffer premature sunburn(at least that's what i called it since we all were about to go back to msia right after the trip), a handful bit of challenges ,and of course,the unpredictables to spice up memories:)
way to go backpackers!! err and bagdragger!!;-) ciow ciow

Thursday, May 26, 2005



they shocked us with that first-minute goal. they mocked us with the second, and they almost killed our spirit with the third blast into the net.The ship was wrecked..but had not sunk yet..not so fast Milan. Why? because we own the world's number one master of tactic ~ none other than that 'bang!!' booster Benitez.
2nd half - change in formation - with didi hamman subtituting steve finnan - proved to be working out very well particularly in that amazing 6 minutes (or perhaps you prefer the term '6 minutes of madness' as ancelotti did) - believing that their mission impossible would work, liverpool players ensured their almost-frustated fans a dramatic comeback. they fought hard, and they fought fast.captain Gerrard set up the canon, smicer ignited the fire and alonso launched the ball- all 3 in 6 magical minutes..
the second penalty shoot-out of the week seemed to prefer us over them.jerzy dudek's choreoform movement sure made milan's shooters's eyes spinning.. way to go liverpool!!!
you deserve your 5th eoropean title =)%

Sunday, May 22, 2005

dutch dazzle

There and back again. I'm back from my first summer trip - Netherlands aka Holland aka Belanda. all i can say is holland is beautiful. Travelling from Einhoven to Amsterdam, meant we had to cross the Dutch land from one end to the other. being the 'flattest' country in the world (you won't find even a small hill) makes the farming field looks soo saujana mata memandang. The houses (i prefer the word 'cottages' actually) were absolutely the real version of what i have always been day dreaming to own (but just as istana hinggap je la ;p or bile tue2 best la kot duduk kt countryside cam ni).Situated in the middle of the green fields,timid horses mowing the grass, with streaming canals, or ponds at one side, windmills here and there - no one can ask more.

Amsterdam - a unique city - bikes are ubiquitous - numerous canals and bridges - buildings are funny-looking to me.a bit cartoon like (how else would you describe 'senget', asymmetrical,and colourful buildings??) - well i wanted to tell more. Alas, im in a state where 'malas' is overwhelmingly overriding my desire to id better stop now ;-)

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

When Royal Rules

simba jesting playfully with the 'Strasbourg born' cigone
Timon - "i can see what happen"
pumba - "what??"
Timon - "and they dont have a clue!!"
pumba - "oh well"
Timon - "they fall in love and here's the bottom line ;
our trio down to two!"
(kindly refer to the scene when Simba met Nala for the very first time after he ran away - The Lion King 1)
These are among the few lines that i could still memorise from the film. Even until today, Lion King remains sitting proudly on the throne of my favourite Disney movies chart - just where the king belongs ;-) 'Snow white and the seven Dwarves' goes second, apparently upgrading her princess' title to Queen heh. the layout of the film is pretty simple actually, but it caught my attention with awe all the same. May be this is what they meant by 'the complex beauty of simplicity'. yeah whatever.. It reminds me strongly of my siblings too. There this one time they kept playing this movie over and over again and surprisingly never got bored!! (well, now you know the reason i manage to remember those lines perfectly.hehe)
i think the way they potrayed the animals were just fitting with every species character. (e.g hyenas as the bad guys, pig as the dumb lad (sorry pumba ;p), elephants, zebras as the timid ones etc etc). Nemo is not bad either, but honestly i was just interested in Dory's character. She really stole the spotlight from the clown fish. hmm ok lah c ni dulu. allez Mufasa!!

Monday, May 16, 2005

me or them?

After going through one long torturous week (definitely the worst this year) plus several stressful, head spinning weeks before that, my life is getting back into place..thank God. still, the impact of abnormalities (which it successfully created) is still there, very hard to get rid off it seems (more resistant than that die hard MRSA!!) for instance, my sleeping clock is still dreadfully haywire - i'm officially imsomniac. Not to mention my eating patterns - disturbed (psychologically) even more badly than the endocarditis of staph. aureus origin! (i really cant think of other analogues hehe - why not put that into the lists of my exam's aftermath as well?)
in short, i am challenged in every sort of ways. for real i felt so hopeless.i felt like i was the most unfortunate person alive at the moment. But God doesnt seem to agree with me. On the way back home right after the last paper, He proved that i was dead wrong.

i happened to sit in front of two young kids in the bus. they were makin some noises (just for the record, i didnt get annoyed yeah) it was only after quite sometimes that i realised one of them wasnt just an ordinary kid - he was a privilleged boy - with impaired hearing and speech(he also wore thick glasses, which meant he was - to some degrees- visually challenged too. he was having difficulty telling his mum what he wanted.then he started crying. at that point, i really felt ( n still feel) sorry for him and began to curse myself for being so oblivious and self-centred. what i had gone through was almost nothing compared to what that little boy ought to endure now and for the rest of his life. stigma.inferiority complex.sense of incapability..and perhaps a lot more..

then, a vision of a homeless man that i chanced upon in Paris floated into mind. he was lying on the sidewalk, desperately reaching for the hot air streaming upwards from the metro underground's heating system... struggling with the cruelly cold paris weather and starvation. looking at his condition, he must be struggling for survival too.he was all wrecked! he had no fortune at all! but i, i am blessed with so much more. yet i am still complaining. still thinking no one has ever felt as down as i had. how can that be??!

i may not be completely wrong in a way. come to think of it, God tests people in many different (n sumtimes unexpectedly weird) ways. the two fellas i mentioned before were tested with physically limiting conditions. as for me (and for most of us i think), it is more psychological..
in a 'manner' of modern speaking, it is 'hell' (wonder where's the manner there -lol).. but it is better - and for that i guess we should be grateful. no matter how 'lost' we feel, there are always millions who are 'meeting dead ends' much worse than we do. -ehem, so now do i sound like a therapist?? :p - didnt intend to hhehe

oh by the way, having crapped all the above, it reminds me one of the quranic verses saying more or less (God forgive me if im wrong) :

'..No soul shall be burdened with what is greater than it can bear..' (2;233)

that's gotta inspire you! - now im a motivator eh?? :p :p

this seems to be a good blog entry after all..huhu.. erk (do keep in mind, s'il te plait ) im not good enough though =l

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Happy Mother's Day mummies!!

"Happy Mother's Day" means more than having a happy day.
Within those words lie lots of things we never really get to say.
It means I love you first of all,then thanks for all you do.

It means you mean a lot to me, and that I honor you.
But most of all, I guess it means that I am thinking of your happiness on this, your day,With pleasure and with love.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

winter in paris

Oh Paris....
i simply love this place..
The magnificent Eiffel tower.i like the view from this angle, there's something serene and calm about it.Oh, it sure does switch on the romantic mode!

Saturday, April 30, 2005

soaking ur fingers in the the butter

this lyric is very poetic to me.. but it's a lovely one. very much reminds me of someone who is soo buttered up with a band to whom this song belongs :p


Di sini mengelamun,
hari mendatang - hari mendatang
kiranya ku memeluk hiba
Begitupun beralun,
hari mendatang -hari mendatang
kiranya ku memeluk hibur

Derusan...kabus ribut yang melimpah
yang mengucap tiba
ku ingin bersamamu
sehingga akhirnya...
Kabus...kabus ribut
indah berseri - seri
Kabus...kabus ribut
bilakah sampainya waktu?

Friday, April 29, 2005

my emotional downturn

im just completely stressed out @ the moment
it s my most miserable time of the year
summer exam..with few other things complicating my currently twisted life
oh i really feel like breakin down
im missing those happy moments
dear exam, please begone quickly n MAKE SURE i got through you without the word fail!!
tu me manques mon coeur .. tellement.. tres tres fort!! :"(

Friday, April 22, 2005

our world...

Every morning on every news flash
I hear the sorrow of the world
It seems like everybody lost and scared
Trying to make sense of it all
And as I travel to and fro
So many faces passed me by
I see lonely hearts living lonely lives
Just biding their time

And while we call ourselves civilised
Many people living empty lives
As they drone their way
Through day and night

I pray for our world,
I pray for every child
I pray for our world,
to be filled with smiles
Like the colours of a rainbow
And not just black and white
I pray for our world,
to be filled with light
I pray for all of us
To choose the path that’s right
To believe in Allah everyday of our lives

In the evening on the TV news,
I see images of war I see brother killing brother ,
with no consequence at all
And while those who claim to be leaders
Sell us tales of deceit
But Allah alone know in their hearts
what they reveal and conceal
And while we call ourselves civilised
We go on killing human lives
Too caught up in our own web of lies

Every mother, every father,Every daughter, every son
Don’t you see that the answer lies
Only with the one

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Bonjour a Blogbliss!!

ah bonjour!!

blissful paradise.. that's what i have in mind.. hope i could turn this so-called personal space of mind into sumthing heaven-like hehehe.what a dream!!
i used to write a lot. quit for quite sometimes..
but now guess im back.
im no professional.suck in many ways.nothing exuberant.i live a simple life.but i just love it.i could never thank God enough for what He has Granted me with.. THANK YOU ALLAH my ULTIMATE saviour

i despise war. Be whatever reasons people give to justify their acts.
it simply doesnt bring us anywhere other than dreadful blood shed.
however, if you end up in one (GOD forbid!!), i believe that RESISTANCE is a duty.
i pity for the fate of the palestians, the chechens, the sudanese etc etc who are never endingly being oppressed by those who i suspect are mentally retarded. How can one be so cruel to another??
are they not human?
i cant help wondering, by killing one soul, they have broken the hearts of hudreds or even thousands others who were related to that person's life. imagine how many more were left in tremendous misery with such a massive loss of lives in war??

they are ways to avoid war...
by avoiding these;
  • hatred
  • racism
  • greediness
  • selfishness
  • and all the bad qualities you could think of
im also into theology (and thats why da vinci code is one of my all time favourite!!). i really think this is one important (or may be the most important) knowledge that a person should have. for me, the study helps to strenghten my faith and makes me appreciate the purpose of life much better.
music!! quite addicted at times. i basically listen to any genres. as for the time being, soo into french chansons esp gerald de palmas' ;)
i like travelling - been to quite a number of places. u ll see lots of these in my blogSpot!!;)
ah sport - liverpool is my choice!!

family is everything
friends are my support
future husband is my present and my future..and he's been my past as well.
what a unique relationship God has created.. of all human relationships, man-woman is just different.

ah enough crap for the intro ;)

au revoir!!!